Periodic Table of Awesoments
December 19th, 2008 by Alex
Behold the Periodic Table of Awesoments – a collection of … things … that have been deemed awesome by 1 guy and a couple of commenters.
Let’s hear about it in the creator’s own words:
In the 300 B.C., years before the birth of black Jesus, Aristole postulated that all good things were made of “win.” That was a pretty good guess, but he was drunk and probably also having an orgy. Modern day awesominers know there are actually 118 fundamental “awesoments” that compose all good things. The Periodic table of Awesoments can be a very useful tool. It’s designed to show the relationships between awesoments, and often one can even predict how awesoments interact simply by their positions on the table.
I saw this and had two immediate reactions:
1) Someone likes videogames.
2) Where the hell is marijuana?
I’m torn here, because there are some totally worthy items on this list of awesomeness – Bacon (Bn), Christopher Walken (Wn), Pirates (P), Mustache (Ds?) and more.
Then again, there’s also crap like Taco Bell, Trilobites and Mullets (well, mullets are awesomely horrible). Still, there seems to be a dangerous blurring of the lines between ‘cool’ and ‘awesome.’ They are not the same thing.
Shit, the element for Mj is Moon Jumps? Really? There isn’t another MJ that comes to mind first?
Ah well, this is a good try to put together a list of all the awesome things in life, but I think we can all agree the periodic table isn’t the place to hold them. Even if you love moon jumps.
